I’m just like everyone else…….

Hello lovely people,

This is a blog post that is very honest. There are going to be people reading this, who may know me and think why in the hell would she write that out for the world to see. I don’t know is the answer and maybe you are right I am mad to share this. I probably am. It’s not about looking for sympathy or anyone to play me a violin. Everyone has insecurities and things that hold them back from the life the want to live, I’m just writing mine down.

I am my own biggest critic and I have a “you are not good enough” mantra in my head, always have. Why do I think like this I don’t know. I am always so genuinely shocked when people show that they like me. My gut reaction is “Really you actually like me?” or I question it to death to the point that I have convinced myself I’ve got it wrong they don’t like me.

I have the world’s most epic fear of failure that means unless I know I can do something 110% I’ll steer clear, just in case I might fail. That applies to everything in my life, relationships, work, activities, everything, fear holds me back.

When it comes to new people or people who are friends but not close friends, I question and tell myself “oh they probably don’t want me around”, “I’ll only be a bother to them”. Do they think this? I dunno maybe they do, the fact that I care is the problem. And to the ones who don’t think like that I’m apologising for all the uncomfortable moments my thoughts got the better of me. Please stick with me.

marilyn quote

Those who are close to me will know I have inherited my Dad’s excellent quick wit and a dash of my Mum’s epic sarcasm that means I deliver one liners without a second thought. The other day at work I used one such sarcastic line in a quick response, the other three ladies in the office were at the point of tears, and I was sitting like a fool thinking “God they really think I’m actually funny.”

I used to read blog posts from bloggers who said they suffer from anxieties and I would be reading it thinking “That must be terrible”.

It has literally only dawned on me that how I feel on an almost daily basis are anxieties too. I don’t do things I want to do for fear of what others will think or what others will say or that I will fail in doing them. Fear of not being good enough holds me back and has held me back from so much it’s ridiculous. The voice inside my own head telling me I’m not good enough is the loudest sound in the world.

I know there will be people who will read this and think, “She is just looking for attention!” I’m not!

There will also be the people who know me and who will go, “well that explains alot!”

There will be people who think “Who is she kidding she is out all the time.” Yes I am but remember social media creates the perfect picture of what you want to share. Unless of course you are like me and decide to write a blog post like this. Again I have no idea why I feel the need to share this. I do know I find writing therapeutic and that I like to know I’m not alone. Everybody has fears. I can’t be the only weirdo in the world who over thinks and over analyses.

There will be people who know me well and wonder who the hell I’m talking about because the person they know isn’t quiet at all, the person they know never shuts up lol. You have managed to knock down my walls and reveal the real me, the good the bad and the ugly. ❤

And there are my best friends who will know this story because they have listened to my over critical thoughts for years. And for that I thank you, I am lucky to have you and I love you more than any words could ever say. ❤

I still don’t understand why I have these fears or what I have to do to overcome them but I have them, just like everyone else…………

Lots of Love..

Laura

xxx

 

I’m not on anti-biotics! 

Hi guys,

Hope you are all keeping well!

 This post is inspired by the lovely Aisling M.Keenan, the editor of Xpose Magazine. I watched her snapchat story explaining why she is tee-total and her experiences of telling people she is like it is some sort of illness. 
While I’m not a pioneer, I wouldn’t class myself as a drinker. I have never been drunk and I’ve never been hungover. And sometimes when you tell people you don’t drink they look at you as if you have an illness. 

When I was in school and drinking was fast becoming the popular thing to do, I always felt a little left out because I knew this wasn’t for me. I didn’t like the taste of alcohol and genuinely still don’t love the taste of it. People in school looked at me like I was the spoil sport or the goody two shoes and this was never the case. 

When I tell people I don’t drink, the most common response I get is “At all?” In other words are you for real what do you mean you don’t drink! Lol! The next question I get is “How do you sit there and not get drunk?” or “Do you not get pissed off with all the drunk people?”

The answers to these questions are simple, I will drink on occasion but generally only a few, I’m not against alcohol I just don’t really like it. Nothing more complicated than that I’m afraid. I can sit there and not get drunk because I don’t find alcohol as a means to enjoyment. To me what I enjoy on a night out is being surrounded by my friends and just having a laugh. Do I feel the desire to be the person providing the laugh or the centre of attention? No, but just because I don’t drink doesn’t mean I’m going to spoil the fun either. And my friends will vouch I can stay till the last at any party.

Do drunk people annoy me? No, I can honestly say drunk people don’t annoy me in the slightest, now at times you will always get one that may just have had too much. I’m very lucky though to be blessed with great patients and most drunken annoyances go right over my head( and that has nothing to do with my little stature) 😜. Having said the majority of people I am surrounded by don’t annoy me drunk or sober because they are my friends. I wouldn’t be friends with people who annoyed me lol!

What really upsets me and bothers me about not being a drinker is when people try and push drink on you. They think you need to have a drink to enjoy yourself because they do. Unluckily for most of them I can be very stubborn when I want to be and the more they nag me to drink, the more I will dig the heels in and not drink lol! 

In Ireland drinking is so much part of our culture that the majority of social events revolve around drinking. This can be challenging at times, when your friends say their perfect Sunday is sitting in a pub drinking for the day, to me that is not my perfect Sunday. But, this just makes us different it doesn’t mean there is something wrong with either of us. To echo the word of Aisling Keenan “maybe we need to branch out and change it up a little” Would it kill us to bring our social occasions outside the pub? 

On nights out I often am the designated driver and mostly by choice, why would I want my friends paying money for a taxi when I can drive anyways. That’s daft in my opinion and I am happier knowing we’re all getting home safe or that we won’t be standing around a street at 3 in the morning and can’t get a taxi. 

So there you have a little insight into my world as a (relative) non-drinker. 

Yes I’m Irish, no I don’t drink and no I’m not on anti-biotics lol! 
Lots of Love 

Laura

Xxxx

   

 

No7 Hot Cloth Cleanser Review

Happy Sunday lovelies!

Apologies for being such a bad blogger lately! Busy with work and life I just didn’t have time to sit down and write for you. 

Anyways I’m here to tell you about a new purchase that I have fallen head over heels with! The No7 Hot Cloth Cleanser, oh Lordy this leaves your skin feeling so beautiful! 

I work in Marketing but I am hands up a marketer’s dream. I believe it all, the “marketing hype”, if they tell me it will make me look like Jennifer Lopez I’d believe it! So I needed to get my hands on a hot cloth cleanser after hearing so many bloggers talk about them. 

I also wanted to pick up the No7 Cleansing Brush which will be another post, and Boots had 3 for 2 on No7, so I picked up their hot cloth cleanser.  

 It’s a thick creamy consistency and it comes with a white Muslin cloth, now this is the only downside in my opinion. The cloth is too thin to hold the heat from the hot water and is nearly cold before you put it on your face. The second time I used this I just used a regular face cloth and the heat lasted longer.

It says for you to relax with the cloth on your face for 10 minutes to allow your skin to soak it all in. Apart from one time the longest I could last was 5 min, I’m just not used to sitting down for a whole 10 minutes and I couldn’t even look at my phone with a cloth over my face 🙈 but even with 10 minutes (5 with cloth, 5 without) my skin felt super super soft and moisturised. 

  
I have normal to combination skin and even leaving it on my skin for 10 minutes it didn’t leave my skin oily, considering it’s so thick I would have thought it might. It didn’t dry my skin either it just left it super soft and squeaky clean. I have been using it twice a week for 3 weeks now and a little goes a long way.. For €12.95 this cleanser will last ages and it is worth every cent. I will definitely be repurchasing. 

  
So if your wanting to get your hands on a really nice hot cloth cleanser I would definitely recommend this.
Lots of Love

Laura 

Xx